Ranma Computer
Viruses
Just me having a little fun.... Apparently,
some time ago, there was this anime computer virus thing released on
raaf. I felt like doing it with Ranma.... Okay, except for the first
one, the Ranma virus, all are original. I got the Ranma virus from that
posting.
Suggestions are more than welcome! I'll post them here, and credit
you for them (I don't plagiarize). I don't mind new ones for characters
already taken, I'll just add a number to them.
My viruses--except for the first one, the Ranma
virus....
- Ranma: computer turns into a Mac when splashed with cold water
(CURSED form) and back to a PC when splashed with hot water (again, this isn't mine, and I'm not able to find out
who posted the article to begin with...)
- Akane: when you use another computer,
you are alternately smashed with a mallet or force-fed toxic food
- Nabiki: your files are "lost" and your computer charges you 5000
yen for them to be recovered...until the next time, that is
- Kasumi: whenever something that
should
crash your computer happens, instead it merely flashes "Oh, my!"
onscreen and merrily continues working
- Soun: anytime an error occurs, your monitor starts gushing tears
- Genma: your hard drive attempts to hide from the motherboard
- Nodoka: the motherboard searches for your hiding hard drive
while carrying a sharpened mounting brace
- Kunou: your monitor intermittenly spouts out bad poetry and then
shorts itself out with blue arcs of electricity
- Kodachi: your computer randomly paralyzes while insane laughter
rings out from your speakers
- Ryouga: it takes five days (minimum) for your hard drive to locate
any file
- Shampoo: the screen suddenly turns uniformly purple while bits of
broken Japanese mixed with Chinese come out of the speaker
- Mousse: the images on the monitor completely fuzz out as various
sharpened pieces of computer hardware attached to wiring spit out
of the floppy drive
- Ukyou: your computer calls you a "jackass" every time you input a
bad command
- Shinnosuke: your RAM wipes out periodically
- Tarou: your hard drive locks up and demands that its label be
changed
- Azusa: all your kawaii little icon files disappear
Sent-in viruses
- Mikado virus: Brags about itself and tries to get 'favors' returned
from female users. (Jason L. Langlois)
- Tofu virus: When the Kasumi virus is loaded, it fogs the monitor
and prints gibberish. When you try to open one filename, it opens
another. (Jason L. Langlois)
- Hinako virus: from time to time, your 286 DOS computer sucks your
battle aura, and turns into a Pentium with Windows. (Jason L. Langlois)
- Mariko Virus: the computer flashes messages on the screen, one
letter at a time. (Blade)
- Picolette Virus: The floppy drive expands to enormous proportions
and eats all your disks. (Blade)
- Hiroshi/Daisuke virus: Your computer refuses to do anything but make
smart-aleck comments on whatever you try to do. (Blade)
- Tsubasa virus: your computer takes a liking into trying to make you
think it's really another household appliance... (Blade)
- Ukyou virus, v.2: Your computer doubles as a robotic chef! True,
the menu is a little limited... (Blade)
- Gosunkugi virus: Your computer tries to use voodoo to force you to
upgrade it. (Blade)
- Happosai virus: causes your computer to spew out lecherous comments
and respond to female users only (Trebuchet)
- Kirin virus: all your files are scrambled by seven layers of
encryption, and the word "Pickles!" scrolls across the screen (Trebuchet)
- Toma virus: it seems to crash your hard drive, but the next day,
your computer works fine (Trebuchet)
- Herb virus: Cold water changes your PC into a Mac, but it doesn't
change back without installing a file called "Kaisuihuu". (Nicholas Leifker)
- Konatsu virus: Causes your PC to think it's a Mac, right down to the
really SLLLOOOOWWWWW processing times. (Nicholas
Leifker, avowed Mac-hater--like the owner of this page)
- Ryouga2: When doused with water, your software suddenly becomes
a memory hog. (Wei-Hwa Huang--no relation...I
think)
- Shampoo2: Crashes all Macs with anti-virus software, and tries to
constantly infect all PCs that have anti-virus software. (Wei-Hwa Huang)
- Akari: Infects memory-hogging software. (Wei-Hwa Huang)
- Kumon Ryuu: Fools the motherboard into believe that IT is the
software you want to run. (Wei-Hwa Huang)
- Gambling King: You have to play insipid casino software and win
before you can do any REAL work on the computer. Of course, it's
all rigged. (Wei-Hwa Huang)
- Lime and Mint: Locks up whenever you download pictures of naked
women. (Wei-Hwa Huang)
- Jusenkyo Guide: Creates massive README file that details very sad
history of five-hundred-year-old files on computer. (Wei-Hwa Huang)
- Shirokuro: Colored like a Gateway 2000 box. (Wei-Hwa Huang)
- Cologne: Installs all these device drivers that are supposed to
stop your anti-virus software from catching the Shampoo virus. (Wei-Hwa Huang)
- Happosai2: Can't survive unless it's on a Mac. (Wei-Hwa Huang)
- Kinnosuke: Uses your modem to distribute money-making schemes on
the Internet. The only actual cash flow you get is your monthly
massive phone bill. (Wei-Hwa Huang)
- Nabiki2: The size of your cache gets smaller, and smaller. (Wei-Hwa Huang)
- Principal Kunou: While displaying strange English phrases on your
screen in front of an idyllic Hawaiian background, truncates the
last kilobyte from every file on your hard disk. (Wei-Hwa Huang)
- Genma2: Comes as a Shogi program. If the computer starts to lose,
it flashes a temporary error message while turning the board
around. (Andrew Eoff)
- Soun2 version: Go program that adds pieces during the error
message. (Andrew Eoff)
- Kirin2 Virus: It crashes if left too long in DOS Prompt spweing out
'W-W-Windows!' every few minutes (Hibiki-kun)
- Laichi Virus: If you leave your computer idle for too long, a voice
from your speakers will blare at you telling you to pay attention! (Hibiki-kun)
- Ryouga Virus v2.1: Whenever you try to delete a file, another one
reappears in the same place (Hibiki-kun)
- Akane Virus 2.2: It will automatically execute a command that will
make the screen shift into various colors and hues while belching and
vomiting noises can be heard from your speakers (Hibiki-kun)
- Kenchan Virus: Your computer will constantly change from Mac, to PC,
to Commedore, to UNIX, to.... (Hibiki-kun)
- Gosenkugi Virus 1.1: It tries to voodoo you into getting it
upgrades. Whenever your computer crashes, there's an annoying voice
going 'please don't hurt me.' And as an added bonus if there's an image
recorder attatched to your computer, it will secretly take pictures of
you and toss them randomly onto the WWW (Hibiki-kun)
- Phonix Egg Virus: It will constantly call the motherboard 'mama'
while making holes in it. It can eventually grow and squeeze out all the
data on your HD (Hibiki-kun)
- Akane Virus 3.0: It will cause your speakers to yell 'BAAAAAKAAAAA'
at the highest volume whenever you do something wrong (Hibiki-kun)
- Pantyhose virus: When splashed with cold water, your operating
system becomes part DOS, part UNIX, part Windows, and part MAC! (Ursula Owen)
- The Akari virus: Your computer begins to smell bad and your desktop
becomes a pig pattern. (Ursula Owen)
- The Happosai3 virus: Your computer yells 'panty! Panty!' every time
you show up (if you're a girl) and begins to trash your files if you're
a guy. (Ursula Owen)
- The Ranma girl-type Sweet Womanhood virus: Your PC turns into a
MAC, then doesn't believe that it ever was a PC and eschews all the
principles of PCness. (Ursula Owen)
- The Toma2 virus: Whenever you try to run an application for more
than ten minutes, your computer says 'This is boring' and promptly
crashes. (Ursula Owen)
- Cologne (or Co Long) virus: Your 286 computer calls you 'son-in-law'
and schemes behind your back with your brand new Pentium, which begins
to say 'Nihao!' whenever you turn it on. (Ursula
Owen)
- Kasumi2: Once the virus implements, it won't allow any files newer
than itself to be accessed. (Raymond Chang)
- Kurumi: Randomly gobbles up your files then says "It was good! Can
I have some more?" (Wade Trischler)
- Natsuma: Stops the Kurumi virus from eating your files but then
both suddenly claim you are their programmer using any fuzzy gif as
evidence. (Wade Trischler)
- RyogaW: Infects any net browser so that it always takes you to the
complete wrong URL. Also gumbles up your directory structure every
few minutes. (Wade Trischler)
- Panda Virus...Your computer mumbles incoherently and will only print
you messages on Word Perfect (Keener
Barnes)
- Ranma2... Every time user name is typed the words tomboy, uncute, or
idiot. Randomly pops up after it (Eric S.
Newlen)
- Genma3... All info downloaded goes into a bottomless pit. It then
asks for seconds (Eric S. Newlen)
- Tendou/Tendo: Sometimes username gets a u, sometimes not (Eric S. Newlen)
- Kodachi2: Unwinds the tape from your backup tapes, then whacks you
with it. (Sean Connor)
- Chiisuiton: Won't let you return to Windows once you enter a DOS
box. (Sean Connor)
- Akari2: Changes the date-stamps of all your files to today's date.
- Ukyou3: Keeps flipping your CD-ROMs over and over.
- Genma4: Your computer engages you to the daughter/son of anyone
kind enough to give it a hardware upgrade. (Sean
Connor)
- Soun3: Whenever you use another computer, your monitor grows to
HUGE proportions, develops a snake's tongue, dons samurai armor, and
berates you. (Sean Connor)
- These are from Jorge A. Pratt:
- Ranko: Your computer starts being cutesy.
- Ranko_2: Combines with the Nodoka virus. Your PC turns into a Mac,
re-labels itself and refuses to change back until the Nodoka virus is
gone.
- Ranma-ch: Your Mac behaves like a PC and insists that it's a PC, but
it has Mac-ish attitudes from time to time.
- Rouge: When splashed with cold water, your system grows three
monitors and gets four more peripherals, crashes constantly and then
leaves you witha a massive power bill.
- Lukkosai_1: Your computer locks up in Corel Draw and throws
Paintbrush at you.
- Lukkosai_2: When splashed with cold water, your desktop PC turns
into a handheld PC.
- Pink_Rink: Your computer ends every single message with "Over."
- Yamasenken: Your computer blatantly steals files while destroying
large sectors of your hard drive and there's nothing you can do about
it.
- Umisenken: Your computer stealthily takes away files while you're
working on another application.
- Kumon_Dad: Your computer executes the Yamasenken virus, then dies.
- Ryouga: That file you thought lost suddenly reappears in the middle
of another application.
- BatDougi: It infects any TPascal program and changes it to C++
language, then all the other applications resent it.
- Orochi: Gobbles up Macs. Especially dangerous when the computer is
infected by the Ranma/Ranko virus.
- Musk_Dyn: The computer gains tremendous upgrades, but locks itself
up when you download R-rated pictures.
- Cursd_Mirror: It creates Mac clones.
- Mt_Phoenix: When splashed with hot water, your computer grows wings
and flies away to China.
- Mt_Phoenix_2: Dries up your data banks. When you destroy it, it
floods your computer with information.
- Shampoo: Obliterates spell/grammar checking in your word processors.
- Mousse: Slices any floppy you try to use.
- Movie_2: Only works on Macs. It changes a Power Macintosh into a
Performa, with much more "bounce."
- Kinjakan: Your computer burns up and then shrinks into a pocket
calculator.
- Gekkaja: Your computer freezes up --literally.
- Saffron: Your computer becomes arrogant and consumes tremendous
amounts of power (similar to the Rouge virus), but whenever you try to
destroy it it regenerates.
- Happosai: Accidentally destroys the Antivirus you were about to use
on Ranma.
- Wedding_end: Activates most virii and creates mass chaos in your
desktop.
- Ukyou_Wed: Your computer acts out of character ^_^
- Kiima_egg: Your computer will believe you're its mother.
- Cursd_Doll: Your computer will try to kill you.
- Cursd_Cave: Sends e-mails to your girlfriend saying you want to
break up.
- Cursd_Swimsuit: Drags your computer to the bottom of the sea.
- Formula_110: Your computer doesn't recognize you as its user. Its
Antivirus is Formula_199.
- Saotome_Ryuu: Your computer comes up with new applications from
watching or adapting old ones.
- Kunou_Ryuu: Your computer shaves your head while you're not looking.
- Manganmaru: Your computer grants three wishes.
- Tea_Cerem: Your computer won't allow you to stand up.
Suggestions? Just a reminder.
Again, I welcome any for characters that already have been taken (I'll
add a number to it or something). And I will remember to credit
you for it. Believe me! I mean, just look at the suggestions section....
^_^
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