Conversation 1
Mom: So, Sally, how's your uterus?
Sally: Fine, I guess. How's your uterus, Mom?
Mom: Sally?
Sally: Oh. Sorry, Mom.
Conversation 2
Billy: Mom. Dad. Can I have a little brother?
Dad: It's fine with me, but you better ask your mother.
Billy: Can I, Mom?
Mom: Oh, that's just fine dear, but are you going to gestate the fetus?
Billy: Oh. Sorry, Mom.
Conversation 3
Dad: Say, dear. It looks like you may have lost a little weight.
Mom: Really? Where?
Dad: Well, you definitely look a little thinner right around the pelvic region.
Mom: Honey?
Dad: Oh. Sorry, dear.
Conversation 4
Sally: Mexico is so beautiful. This is the best vacation ever, Dad!
Dad: I'm glad you kids are enjoying yourselves. I just wish we had a better way to smuggle the hashish across the border.
Billy: I got it! Mom's uterus!
Mom: Aren't we forgetting something, Billy?
Billy: Sorry, Mom.
Conversation 5
Sally: Is there any mail for me, Dad?
Dad: Let's see. We've got bills...Billy's report card...more bills...Oh, look, dear. You got this month's issue of "Uterus Today."
Mom: Thanks, dear, but you can keep it.
Dad: But, honey? You love...Oh, I'm sorry, dear.
Conversation 6
Mom: Sally, I can't believe you're growing up. Your first date! It's so exciting!
Sally: Actually, Mom, I need to ask you a favor.
Mom: Well, what's that, dear?
Sally: Can I borrow your uterus?
Mom: Oh, dear. I wish I could, but it's a little late for that now.
Sally: I'm sorry, Mom.
Conversation 7
Fred: I'll see your two and raise you four.
Jim: I'll see your six.
Dad: Wow. Looks like I'm just about cleaned out, but I don't want to let this hand go. I know. I'll see your six and raise you my wife's uterus.
Steve: Aren't we forgetting something?
Dad: Oh, you're right. I guess I'll just have to go shy.
Conversation 8
Mom: How nice to see you, Father O'Riley.
Father O'Riley: And how nice to see you.
Mom: And what brings you here, Father?
Father: Actually, I'm here for the holy Eucharist.
Mom: Well, I'm sorry, but I don't think I can help you.
Conversation 9
Mom: How may I help you, sir?
Skelator: I am looking for all the power in the Universe!
Mom: Well, you won't find it here. Sorry.
Conversation 10
Billy: Mom, it's show and tell tomorrow.
Mom: It's the big jar in the pantry.
Billy: Thanks, Mom.
