Simple Rules of Ballroom Dance Etiquette

Dress should be suitable for dancing. Ladies, in particular, should bear in mind the "dancer friendliness" of their attire (beaded sleeves that swipe their partner’s faces, snagging fabrics, long trains etc. should be avoided at all costs). Gentlemen should always close their jackets or take them off before dancing.

Ideally, dress should be suitable for the occasion.

Personal oral and bodily hygiene is of utmost importance. If you notice that your partner is hesitant to get into the proper ballroom hold, is holding their breath, bolts from the dance floor once the dance is over and repeatedly refuses to dance with you again, take the hint.

Heavy perfumes and highly volatile hair styling products should be used sparingly since some dancers may be chemically sensitive. Strong fragrances can make even the average person woozy

Punctuality is always appreciated at social events.

Either the man or woman may ask for a dance

When asking for a dance, try not to be overly aggressive—i.e. take the hint after two refusals

Try one’s best not to turn down anyone who has asked for a dance. It is all right to state that one is "sitting this one out" or that one is not familiar a particular dance. It is extremely rude to turn down one person and then accept another invitation during the same dance number.

Introduce yourself to your partner right away

With couples of two different genders, the gentleman always leads the lady

Cutting in is quite acceptable at dance classes but should be avoided at social events

At the end of a dance, one should thank his/her partner for the dance and leave the partner at the "sidelines" instead of on the dance floor.

The Claw: this is when a woman clutches the man right arm with an iron grip. This can be painful with long nails especially in combination with the Coat Hanger

The Coat Hanger: this is when the woman does not support the weight of her own arms or body but sort of hangs off her partner as dead weight that he must drag across the dance floor

Role reversal: Other than lack of rhythm, the most common complaint that men have: women who lead and/or don’t follow the man’s lead. This faux pas will land you on the sidelines (and blacklisted) for sure unless you have stunningly good looks.

Limp-wristed spaghetti arms: this is physically taxing and no fun for the man since he has put in twice as much effort to lead the woman

Miss Sourpuss: shaking one’s head, rolling one’s eyes, looking bored, unenthusiastic or pissed off and ignoring one’s partner all fall into this category of bad attitude. As my ballroom dance teacher at Berkeley once stated: "In dancing, it is the job of the woman to look like she is having the time of her life"

The Non-Existent Lead: Ambiguous or non-existent leads are most common complaint of female ballroom dancers. It is not the job of the woman to know what steps to do. A firm lead is always appreciated since it is usually the woman that ends up looking incompetent when the man doesn’t lead properly. Ambiguous leading leaves the woman thinking " What does this guy want from me ???"

The Egoist: My dance teacher at Berkeley also said " The primary job of a male dancer is to make his partner look good," It is, therefore, considered impolite to dance above the level of one’s partner. If you sense that a lady is not comfortable with a certain step, avoid it. Please be sensitive to your partner’s level of dance experience.

Limp-wristed spaghetti arms: Lack of frame is bad enough in women but it makes dancing almost impossible when it is the man that is guilty of this faux pas.

The Dictator: Men who lead by barking orders and arm-wrenching are unpleasant. Though this is somewhat rare, what is more common are men who, to various degrees, bulldoze and drag their partners across the dance floor. This is particularly unpleasant when dancing the faster dances with larger men, an experience that is akin to being slammed by granite block (remember, p=mv).

The Pervert: Wandering hands, indiscreet stares, stalking, unwanted advances, men who circle the dance floor checking out women and the list of lecherous behavior goes on and on and on…You know who you are. You are fooling yourself if you think that we don’t.