The secretive all-star super spy society, self-styled "The Fifth Column," is soon sitting to swallow up succulent steaks, slurp down spicy Szechuan stir-fries, and snack on savory sweets. The situation: they're so senselessly sociopathic that the service shan't start 'til a suitable seating sequence is settled. Sort the seven spies, straightaway!

The sleuths:

Austin Powers
James Bond
Joseph Conrad
Modesty Blaise
Nikita
Sydney Bristow
Valerie Plame

The stipulations:

1. The three people who sat down immediately after James Bond were: Dr. Evil's nemesis, the French spy portrayed by Parillaud, and the person who sat down third of all.

2. Joseph Conrad almoust succeeded in his chivalrous attempt to have all the ladies sit before him, except that Modesty Blaise and Sydney Bristow insisted on standing around as they chatted about explosives.

3. Of the two people to sit down right before and right after Austin Powers, one was the exposed Alaskan, the other was a Polish author, and both were non-fictional.

4. True to her name, Modesty Blaise made sure everyone else was seated before her, while Miss Moneypenny's brazen crush had no qualms sitting first of all. (All the other agents played it safe by sitting innocuously in the middle somewhere.)